Monday Weigh In....

FINALLY the scale moved.  Dang.....I was so ready to call out the fat cell police and tell them to open the damn flood-gates!  So, I was down to 285.4 last Monday on the 1st, then shot back up to 288 the next day, then hovered all week around 287/286/288.  Was SOOO frustrating.  I mean, I know my body is in shock, and it's panicked, and I know stalls are totally normal, but man, it was frustrating. 

But today, today....I got on the scale this morning and finally it was down to 284.2!!!  Actually, the SCALE wasn't down to 284.2, I WAS!!!  It's ME that's down to 284.2.  So now hopefully the scale will keep moving until my next stall, which hopefully will be at least a few weeks away.  I decided that Monday will be my 'official' weigh in and record day.  I mean, I weigh every day, I can't help it, I'm addicted, but officially I will use Monday's weight.  I was going to do Thursday, as that was the day of my surgery, but Mondays seem so much cleaner, somehow.  Weird....

 

 

So can I just say I LOVE my sleeve.  I have to admit I was really worried about the surgery, the chance of a possible leak (very, very rare!), that something might happen to make this not the dream it seemed to be.  But everything has gone off without a hitch (knock on every piece of wood around!)  I honestly often forget I have had this done.  Just last night I reached for one of Baby C’s Reese’s cups from his Halloween bucket without thinking.  I almost wish there were something physical to remind me, like a stomach cramp, or something like a shock collar! 

At first my tummy felt like I had been doing sit ups for three days straight, but it’s now much, much better   My surgeon says that they insert air in between the muscle and abdominal wall which stretches the muscle out, hence the soreness.  A few days ago, I stretched up and out too much while reaching for something and it feels like I tore my muscles in there like a really bad workout.  So I’ve been more sore for a couple days, but even that is now almost completely gone.  And my incisions are healing beautifully I am putting Bio-Oil on them every night and every morning out of the shower. 

So I had refried beans last week for the first time.  I got them through a wonderful little Mexican restaurant down the road from my work, so they are more runny than the canned kind….and they were SO FREAKIN’ good!!!  I asked for extra cheese on top and mixed it all in and it was the best soft, warm comfort food ever!  Good fiber and protein.  And I have lots for leftovers!  More carbs than I thought though….can’t be a regular once I can eat ‘real’ food. 

I’ve been a little concerned for a while since it’s so easy for me to eat almost ½ cup of food at a time, like mashed potatoes, ricotta bake, whatever.  It seems like a lot to eat so soon after my surgery.  I keep reading on the boards that a lot of people can only handle a few teaspoons!!??  There is no discomfort or pain, so I’m pretty sure I’m not overdoing it.  I do still feel like there is a restriction where my esophagus meets my tummy as whenever I eat, it seems to just sit there for awhile.  This concerns me as my leak test the day after surgery showed the contrast not going down at all, not for a while until I walked around the ward for 10 minutes.  It still seems ‘tight’ but it’s not painful or unmanageable and I’m sure it will continue to loosen up, as it has so far.  Drinks go down fine, now, and they used get hung up a bit.  Then again, maybe the esophagus thing is a sign of being full?  Maybe my tummy doesn’t feel full anymore, but my esophagus feels it?  Am I overeating??  Hmmmm…..I’ll have to find out on the boards, verticalsleevetalk.com. 

I  will try to get a pic up of my incisions so you can see how little they are and how well they are healing.  I know I was curious as to how those looked before my surgery.  I also want to get before pics up so I can track my progress month by month. 

Take care, my lovelies, and I will see you soon in my Cupcake (Cheeseburger) Dreams!! 

Surgery done! On my way!!!!

See??!!  I TOLD you I was worried I would be bad about keeping this up.  I knew it would be tough before surgery since there was really nothing to report on, but I thought after surgery, it would be a daily thing.  I was wrong :(   Part of the problem was that while at home recovering from surgery, I was reading and lurking from my little netbook on my recliner and it's too hard to type while sitting in a recliner on a netbook! 

But today I am back at work (yesterday first day back) so now I am at my desk and fully present again!

All the days leading up to surgery, since I last posted, were uneventful.  I was worried more about this surgery than any other I've had, and of course was worried as I have a beautiful little boy who needs his mommy, but never once did I doubt the decision I had made.  

So, to make a long story short (which by now, you probably know I can't do!), I had a fantastic surgery with no complications, very little pain, very fast recovery....pretty boring overall.  I was surprised when I woke up from surgery how much pain I was in, though, even with a PCA pump.  I thought it would be minimal compared to other surgeries, but I was surprised.  Especially for me, since I have a VERY high tolerance to pain and heal really fast.  (I was walking the halls and carrying my baby the same day as my C-section with the nurses yelling at me the whole time).  I was fine by the next day, though.  Not perfect, was sore and was definitely moving around gingerly, but I was okay with my pain meds.  I was off my pain meds by day 4, even my liquid Tylenol. 

I had one scare the day after during my leak test (drink contrast while the doctor watches on a screen).  I went down to radiology and drank this nasty, foul, awful contrast (worse than normal contrast in case it gets in your body through a potential leak).  I was afraid I was going to have to drink about 8 oz, but they said only about 1-2, so that was good.  At this point, I was so freakin' thirsty, I thought ANY kind of wetness would be good, but boy was I wrong!  That stuff is soooooo bitter!  Anyhoo, I stood in front of the scanner, drank my cocktail, and waited, but the radiologist told me it wasn't moving...it was stuck at the bottom of my esophagus and not going anywhere.  I asked if that was normal, and he said, not really -it's normal to have it go really slow, but not to not move at all.  So then I started to get worried.  He had me sit for about 5 -10 minutes, then had me stand in front of the scanner again, but it still hadn't moved.  Now I was getting MORE worried.  I was SOOO thirsty and I know they weren't going to let me drink, obviously, if I couldn't get anything down!  So then he had me go for a walk around the radiology dept and come back. Once I got back and stood in front of the scanner again, a little had moved all the through, but most was still stuck up top.  They didn't make me drink anymore nasties, though.  Then he said he would call my doctor to discuss, but I still could not have anything by mouth.  Now, I had had surgery at 7:30 the preceding morning and I wasn't even allowed ICE CHIPS!  Nothing by mouth meant NOTHING, I guess.  And I was so dry. 

So went back to my room all worried about the leak test since almost nothing went through...did I have a stricture already?  Was I just really swollen??  And how could they know if I had a potential leak because they didn't see the fluid go through?? 

Anyway, my doctor came a little bit later on his rounds, told me everything looked fine, enough went through where they could see if there were leak problems or potential and not to worry about the fluid not going down, it was only because I was swollen and it would ease.  But the most important thing was that I could have fluids now!  Hallelujah!!!  After that, it was uneventful and I was home by five that day. 

At home, it was really weird trying to drink as there was always that 'pressure'....this little 'hangup' before whatever I'd drank decided to move into my new little tummy.  I was very conscious of this because of my failed leak test and figured liquid was just hanging out in my esophagus and I didn’t want to ‘flood’ myself.  I would just drink really, really slow and it slowly got better, day by day.  I started on full liquids, so I was drinking protein shakes, Carnation instant breakfast with fortified milk and unflavored protein (which is NEVER unflavored), strained cream soups.  Not much the first few days, obviously.  I didn’t even try to get in the 700 calories and 50 grams of protein minimum my doctor wanted.  There was no way.  I just drank water to keep hydrated and took in what I could.  As they days went on, the more I take.  I was actually surprised by day five or so what I could take in.  I had always read that people couldn’t even take in four teaspoons of liquid, but I could drink an 8oz shake in about a half hour (after about 3-4 days, that is).  But still, that pressure if I took too big of sips, or too many at once.  And through all this, NO HUNGER, thank God.  I did have small, very small cravings, like “wouldn’t that be good,” or wouldn’t that taste good right now”, but easily ignored and looked over as the head hunger it was. 

So, just day after day, each day got better, each day I could take in a little more.  Which leads to today….which I will continue in the next post, since this one is getting SOOOO long!!!

Buckle Up, Please, this ride's not for sissies!

Oh, man.  I've gone and done it.  I've actually jumped through all the hoops and prequalifications to have someone put robotic arms into my abdominal cavity, place a line of thousands of titanium staples in my stomach, and then remove about 85% of that same stomach. 

And this is by choice!  By choice, do you hear!  No, I'm not crazy, not off the deep end, not cockoo for Cocoa Puffs.....I'm just desperately, unhappily, unhealthily (that even a word?) morbidly obese.  (oooohhhh, I said it.......)

Soooooo, I've decided to do something about it....maybe some would think it's drastic, I happen to think it's necessary.  I've decided to have the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (VSG).  What's that, you ask?  Instead of going into a long, medical discussion, here is a link describing what it is VSG Info and Video.  In a nutshell, about 85% of the larger part of the stomach is removed, leaving a banana-like shape behind, removing the part of the tummy that produces most of the body's ghrelin (hunger hormone) and also the most stretchy part of  the stomach (you know...the part that allows us to eat 2 lbs of turkey, mounds of stuffing and mashed potatoes and green bean casserole at Thanksgiving, along with half a punkin' pie with whipped cream!?)

   

What's left is a little banana shaped tube (or sleeve) that only holds about 1/2 cup of food with a resting diameter of about a quarter.  This is where some people think I've gone off my rocker.....my Mother among them!!  Don't get me wrong, my Mother is all for this and me getting healthy, she just can't fathom her 5'10" 300 lb daughter only eating a half cup of food!!  And she's only 5'4", poor little bitty thing.  Still can't figure out where the hell I came from :) More on all that later...*sigh* so much to say in so little space!  And here I thought I would have nothing to write about!!! 


Second disclaimer: for anyone wanting more info about VSG, specifically from those who have had it done and those waiting to have it done, please visit www.verticalsleevetalk.com.  This online forum is absolutely amazing.  Shout out to my VST peeps here :)  

So, here I am.  October 20, 2011 is the start date of the rest of my life.  I am going to try and blog about my experience along the way.  I honestly don't know how consistent I'm going to be, but I'm sure going to try.  There's nothing I hate more than getting into a good weight loss surgery (WLS) blog and someone posted five times, then never again.  I also want to do this so I can look back and see my progress, my struggles, failures, successes, fears, accomplishments...well, you get the idea.  I also have to give another shout out to someone who doesn't even know I exist.  It's the wonderful lady of the "Once Upon a Time in the Land of Cheese and Sunkist" http://cheeseandsunkist.blogspot.com/.  Amy, you inspired more than you can ever, ever imagine and I will ALWAYS be thankful to you for your honesty and humor.  

Along those lines, I am going to apologize in advance, for I will be brutally honest about my journey, all good things and bad.  There will probably be some profanity along the way, when I am frustrated and hurting.  I can guarantee, it won't always be sunshine, rainbows, and little ponies.  Life isn't like that, and neither will my weight loss surgery journey.  I know some may get offended, or be horrified at my TMI posts, but really, if you will be scarred and traumatized for life, then please refrain from reading further.  All who know me and love me know I am very blunt and open and honest.  But I am also funny, loving, and ever optimistic. 

So, if you're with me....get into my Cupcake Dreams roller coaster, strap in (I have belt extenders if you need them *snicker*) and get ready to come with me for the trip of my life.  I hope to amuse, educate, entertain, and support. 

Heerreeeee we goooooooooooooooooooo!!!......